Re-wire Yourself for Wealth

Karen Berzanski: 00:00:00

Just acknowledging that money is a fundamental part of our lives. Money can help amplify the things that we value and are so deeply important to us. And then in turn, we can look at money as something that is also deeply important and valuable to us.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:00:23

This is the Entrepreneur School Podcast where we believe you can run a thriving business and still make your family a priority. This show is all about supporting you the emerging or early stage Entrepreneur on your journey from solopreneur to CEO while wearing all of the other hats in your life. My name is Kelly Sinclair and I'm a brand and marketing strategist who started a business with two kids under 3am, a corporate PR girl turned entrepreneur after I learned the hard way that life is too short to waste doing things that burn you out. On this show, you'll hear inspiring stories from other business owners on their journey, and learn strategies to help you grow a profitable business, while making it all fit into the life that you want. Welcome to entrepreneur school.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:01:11

Hey there, Karen, thank you so much for joining me on entrepreneur school. I am really excited to hear you talk about all things money mindset, and some really unique strategies that we can use to tap into See what I did there. Your the way that we're thinking about money. So welcome to the show.

Karen Berzanski: 00:01:33

Thank you so much for having me. I'm super excited to be here.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:01:37

It's great to talk about this is kind of like a taboo topic, right? Talking about money and talking about like, first of all, that in and of itself is enough of a jumping off point, I think for us to dive into. Why did we think that we're not supposed to talk about money? And why do we have so much like stigma around this? And how does that then influence the way that we think about money, and then the way that we're able to earn money and ask for money as entrepreneurs 20 questions at once go.

Karen Berzanski: 00:02:08

Okay, I'm ready. No, I think just the word money in freaked people out, they want to just slowly back away from the conversation, it's, you know, they think it's not nice, I shouldn't be talking about money, it's tacky to talk about money. And these are all beliefs that stem from our family of origin money programming, from our religious money programming, and from patriarchal money program, because there's nothing inherently bad, wrong, dirty, tacky, or anything else about money is just a neutral energy. It's just a way that we exchange energy for goods and services. Money is actually a made up concept, it doesn't even really exist, except the fact that we have created it. And we use it as a form of exchange for goods and services. So I think there are a lot of reasons why we avoid the conversation, why we don't like talking about it. And I think talking about it, and having these conversations is the first step to normalizing it. And helping people jump on board in the money conversation so that they can create a financial future that they're really excited about living into and not feel guilty or bad or shameful about that.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:03:25

Yeah. So you do a lot of work as a money mindset coach, and what does that even mean? money mindset, I feel like I didn't even know that existed as a concept until, you know, as I had started into my entrepreneurial journey, and done some, like personal development work. And I remember, like, I think I read the book, you're a badass at making money by Jensen cero. And I like gave it to my husband, because there's another side of the belief system, which is like, oh, you know, if you just fix your money mindset, you'll fix your financial situation. And then that sounds a bit hokey. Yeah, you know, I'm just gonna think differently about money and like, no, but out affirmations and you know, maybe sleep with a special stone in your pillowcase.

Karen Berzanski: 00:04:20

And now that's not it. That's not it. If that works for some people, I got more power to you. So when I think about money mindset, I think about our relationship to money, just like we are in relationship with another person. So are we in relationship to money. So the energy that I bring to my relationship with you is going to influence the relationship that we have and vice versa. So the relationship that I have with money is going to be influenced by the energy that I am bringing to it. And so much of the time the energy that we're bringing to money is one of fear and scarcity and overwhelm and you have all of the power and I have none of the power. And we bring this you know, there's, I talk about bad boyfriend energy that we bring to money which I, I steal from Kyle see. So hat tip to Kyle sees. But that's like, you know, if you are on a date with someone and you're like, you know, you're the root of all evil, I want more of you and loathe you at the same time you hold all of my power, I am worthless without you. Like, do you want to stick around on that date? Like, do you think that person is going to be attracted to you? Probably not. And yet, we bring that energy to money, and we wonder why it's not sticking around. So it's like, How then can I shift my energy so that I can show up on a date with money so that I can show up at the table with money, with the energy of you are amazing, I am amazed by how much good you do in the world and how much better my life gets with you in it. This is incredible. Thank you so much for being in my life. You are my ally, and my partner, and you support me in amplifying the things that are important to me in my life. Wow, I am so grateful. Like that's more of the energy and like you're super sexy. That's more of the energy that's going to want to make money stick around. Right. So

Kelly Sinclair: 00:06:25

Whoo, I have never heard it put that way like so personified. Like you just did. That is amazing. To think about it like and so proud of people shift then from like, acknowledging that their relationship with money currently might be that bad boy boyfriend energy. And that even if we're not aware of it, but now now we are because Karen just did that beautiful demonstration for us. How do we shift from bad boyfriend energy to Sexy Money energy?

Karen Berzanski: 00:07:02

Yeah, that's a great question. Well, you can find a PDF that I have in my my free money mindset training, that talks about 21 different, I call them abundance activating strategies. So there's practical strategies that you can use to start getting in right relationship with money right now. But it's things as simple as you know, writing down what money has brought you in your life, like what positive things as money given you in your life? Oh, well, money has given me a roof over my head money has sent me to college money has put clothes on my back money has allowed me to have a family and to go on vacations. Money has allowed me to start a business money has allowed me to have clean water. So it's starting on a very simple level, and finding and looking for the ways that money has amplified the things that are most important to you in your life. Because a lot of times two, people will say, Oh, money's not that important to me. And it's like, but if you reframe that, and look at it, from the perspective of money has given me the opportunity to have more time with my family, to have a wonderful career to have beautiful things in my environment, whatever those things are, money is helping you amplify the things that are most important. And therefore, I would argue that money can also be considered one of the things that is important to you. So it starts really right there. And just acknowledging that money is a fundamental part of our lives. Money can help amplify the things that we value and are so deeply important to us. And then in turn, we can look at money as something that is also deeply important and valuable to us.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:08:52

So do you think that people don't want to admit that money is important? Because we think that that makes us what greedy or like we're looking for the wrong things, or we have the wrong motivation now with what we're doing?

Karen Berzanski: 00:09:07

Absolutely. I mean, it can be one of many, many different beliefs that people have around money, be turning into a Am I allowed to swear on your podcast and go for it. turning into a greedy asshole, is a legitimate fear that I've seen a lot of people have. And they think that if I have more money, that means I'm materialistic. That means I'm greedy. That means like, you know, I've recently heard one of my students say, you know, the other moms in my community aren't going to like me, like, I'm not going to feel like a part of the mom group. If I start, like really amping up my business and making more money, it's going to feel like I'm better. Like I think I'm saying I'm better than they are. So then there's that idea of like, if I have more money, I become someone who thinks they're better than other people. Well, is that true? You You know, is that going to happen. So these are kind of like the hidden programs that start to pop up as we do a little exploratory work around the money because it's a little bit different for everyone. But it's also like, it's kind of like the hero with 1000 faces, it's the same story and in a million different ways. So it could be like, I'm afraid, I'm going to turn into a greedy rich person, it could be, I don't want to make more money, because and this is again, another example for one of my students, I don't want to make more money because my parents made money, their higher power. And I saw what that did to their relationship and to our family. And therefore, I'm going to take my hands off the wheel and not even think about money. And I'm not going to try to make it because I don't want to be that. So like with her, we had to like i She had to her opportunity was to kind of detach with love from her family's money program. And she realized that, you know, when she took herself out of that, and she separated herself from their belief system, and started seeing what money could actually do for her and reframing it for herself. She decided that she wanted to become a millionaire. And she started taking action steps to get there. And she started finding ways like there was, you know, that site, is it called Rakuten, Rakuten. It's like a, it's like a shopping site where like, if you, if you sign up for their app, and you shop at certain sites, they'll send you money, and they'll send you like cash in the mail or a cheque. And she started, she signed it up for that. And she's she said, I never would have signed up for something like this, if I hadn't been part of this conversation, because that's another way that that money can come in. And she's like, I just, I wouldn't even have registered in her conscious mind. Because that's not something that she would do. Because money's not important to her. Then it's like, though, when we start to shift our perspective, we start noticing things like there are these opportunities for money to come in that I didn't even see before, because I had the paradigm of like, money's not important to me, and I shouldn't want it and, you know, it screws up relationships.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:12:05

Right. And so we're blocking then.

Karen Berzanski: 00:12:07

And we're blocking it. Right. Right. So yeah, it's really interesting to see what people's blocks look like, and how and why we're blocking money from coming in.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:12:21

Yeah. So with what you're saying, here, I'm hearing this in a different way. Like, I've done some of my own work to explore this to get more familiar with this concept of money mindset. But what I'm kind of hearing you say, and so let me know if this is like, an okay interpretation, is that, and I think I want to say this, just to address the, the disconnect that we sometimes have between what our how our mindset affects our actions, right? Because mindset alone and thinking about things alone does not make a result, it does not create anything. And so I think maybe that's where people sometimes might be like, well, whatever, like changing your mindset doesn't change your outcome. But changing your mindset changes the actions that you take, which then does change your outcome, like your client, you said, who was like, Oh, I realized that I do want to become a millionaire. So therefore, I'm going to open myself up to ideas and possibilities, and explore different ways to actually bring money in, which I never would have done before. Because if I don't believe that I want to be a millionaire, that I'm not going to do anything about actually becoming one,

Karen Berzanski: 00:13:33

And that it's possible for me, and then I will remain a good person. And not only will I remain a good person, but my goodness will be amplified when I have more money. Ooh, yeah. And I'm not going to become my parents, because I am my own, you know, my own person, right? I make my own choices moving forward. Right? It's like, Whoa,

Kelly Sinclair: 00:13:54

Yeah. And then you do the thing around it. Right? Because you have to be you have to deal with the inside. First, that's preventing you from taking the action or, you know, making the change that's required for you to get the result that you want. Sometimes we think that we want to resolve we think we have a goal. But then we're actually in conflict internally about it.

Karen Berzanski: 00:14:16

Right. And that's, that's a I'm so glad you said that. Because if she had started taking that action, before she had done the work, there's a great chance that she would have sabotaged her own success because there was a program running in her subconscious mind. That said, it's not safe to put my attention on money. It's not safe to be a rich person. It's not safe to have X amount of dollars in the bank. It's not safe to consciously go out into the world with the idea that I am going to make money. That's not safe. And so if she tried to go out and take all the actions, and that program was running, that's when sabotage pulls us back and we're like, why am I not getting anywhere? So that's when like kind of this happened. In our subconscious mind where one part of our brain has the conscious desire to make more to have the six, seven figure business, whatever that goal is, and that other part is like, no, no, no, you don't want to turn into your parents, you're gonna turn into your parents. And if you don't identify this subconscious belief that hangs out, I always imagined it back here, it's like hanging out in the background, if you don't identify it, that part is going to just keep pulling you back, no matter how much you want to move forward. So there's always that internal conflict. And when we're tapping, like tapping is my tool of choice. That's the thing for me that helps this, go from this to this, it helps loosen and release that internal conflict, so that we have conscious awareness of what that program was or is. And then we can start to feel safe moving forward into the vision that we want. And know that this part because we've already brought it from back here to around here where we can see it, it's not going to hold us back, it's just going to kind of either dissolve, or just we'll just sort of notice it and be like, Okay, I get I feel that program coming up again, and I'm just going to keep going. But it doesn't hold us back anymore.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:16:09

That was an amazing visualization that came from what you just said there. And so I wonder, first of all, when to people? What's the question? I'm trying to phrase here? Because it's when it's subconscious, like you say, it's, we're unaware of it, generally. Right? So how do we tap into what we're unaware of?

Karen Berzanski: 00:16:33

Well, that's where this work comes in. So it's really about exploring these different areas where our money stories are formed. And so that's what are your stories from your family of origin? What did you learn growing up about money? And what did you learn about rich people and about what it means to be rich? What do you think you're going to have to do? Or how are you going to have to act differently? When you have more money? What do you think is going to change in your life? And that's gonna that question alone is going to bring up some stuff than if you look at the religious programming of your youth, like, what religion or spiritual upbringing Did you were you raised with? And what did that teach you about? I mean, personally, I was raised Catholic, I was raised that, you know, the poor people are the more godly people like there's poverty and godly, what is the phrase, there's virtue in poverty. So that's, I was raised in a very, like, you know, you keep yourself small and humble, you don't get too big, because that's going to offend other people. You're nice and polite, which also is a money. Like, you know, as women, we're trained to be nice and polite. And it's like, well, if I go out into the world, and I start wanting to speak up and have a voice and talk about issues, or have an opinion in my business, or whatever it is, like that's going to trigger something that you know, where your your past programming comes in and says, Oh, no, no, no, no, no, nice. Girls are quiet, nice. Girls don't dye their hair platinum blonde, nice. Girls, don't dress like that nice. Girls don't put themselves on video, you know, whatever that thing is, that kind of reasserts itself from your past. So there's the family stuff, the religious stuff. Then there's the societal and societal programming and programming from the media, which is like, how do you how women have been portrayed to us through the images that we see in commercials and television and in movies, and ads, and things like that, and how rich people have been portrayed. And all of that has seeped into our subconscious mind. Like, if you think about like, who are the villains in the movies, like, it's usually like, the greedy, rich people are the bad ones. And then it's like the heroes of the movie, or like the suburban mom and dad, who are living at, you know, a lovely, humble life, who don't have a lot of money, but they have their values intact. And it's not, it's not a bad, good, bad thing. But it's just something to notice, you know, and we just, we see it over and over and over again. And again, like the, what we see in terms of powerful women being reflected back to us, like if you're over the age of 25, or 30, you received a lot of messages about, you know, what it's like to be a powerful woman in the world, and the consequences that you might face. If you use your voice. If you are in a leadership position. If you try to run a company, if you are in the government, if you are a congressperson, whatever it is it's like you can't get it right. You can't you know, it's like, you can't do it right. One way you can't do it right another way and it's like this catch 22 of like, there's always going to be someone saying something about how we're doing it wrong. So

Kelly Sinclair: 00:19:53

It's the Barbie monologue.

Karen Berzanski: 00:19:55

Yes, exactly, exactly. It is the Barbie monologue. But again, if We don't have awareness around that, and what those programs are specifically for us, those programs are going to be running our money show, because all of those things are contributing to our money mindset. Because if you want to make more money, you got to know who you are, you got to know what you want to say, you got to know your own worth, you got to be firm in your own value. And you gotta believe in yourself. And it ain't easy out there. It's not easy. Who's just community and tapping and having tools and resources to to help us all move forward and move through these crazy programs?

Kelly Sinclair: 00:20:34

Yeah, yeah, like right away, I want to say, well, it's not easy to also, it's not easy to struggle financially, it's not easy to feel like you can't make it work out. So which choose your heart. Right?

Karen Berzanski: 00:20:50

Right. That's, I mean, that's a beautiful point. Choose your heart, because it's gonna be hard either way. Yeah, it's it's sorry to be the bearer of bad news.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:21:00

That's what we're all about here on entrepreneur School. Welcome to reality chat. Which is there's,

Karen Berzanski: 00:21:08

There's a sense of, you know, like, fun and passion when you're when you're going towards what it is that you want to create, even though it's hard. You're doing the damn thing. And I think there's something about that, that's like, yeah, it's hard. But I could do it, I can do it. So I think, for me anyway, and I looks like for you, as well. And I'm sure for your listeners, too, that that kind of hard, can really help fuel us moving forward.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:21:38

Yeah, exactly. Oh, I love all of this so much. Just just to kind of like summarize some of the key points that you're making. When we give ourselves some space to look at what you were calling, like, what our programs are what's playing in that subconscious background. And coming up, when it comes to money is an opportunity to take the thing from behind us, that's like pulling us backwards and bring it into the forefront. So that we can be like, Oh, hey, you again, and just like move aside and keep moving forward? Rather than feeling in that internal conflict with ourselves? Which so what are some of the things you say to potential clients who are like, listening to this conversation, and starting to think, I don't quite know, if I am sabotaging myself, or struggling with money mindset, because I maybe haven't thought about it before?

Karen Berzanski: 00:22:40

Well, I would say if you are in, if you if you have been trying to reach a goal for a long time, and you're not making any progress on it, you likely have a money block. That's, that's a good place to start. If you're hitting a plateau, and you can't seem to rise above it, there's probably something going on in subconscious that says, I can only make, you know, maybe you've made $100,000 a year in your business. And that's amazing. And you want to double it, triple it, you want to get to seven figures, but like you can't seem to do it, there's probably something going on there that says, you know, and here's another thing that's interesting. I was gonna say there's another thing that's going on there that says, you know, who will they think I am? If I go for seven figures, right? I already have enough. At six figures, I already have more than enough. So that money block can come up looking like that, but it's what I was gonna say is our money blocks look the same at all levels of success, pretty much where it's like, Who will they think I am? If I try to start a business, like, for example, like going back to my other client who is like in her mom group, and she's thinking, Who will they think I am? If I start and you know, get going in my business and start making the money that I want to make? Who were they going to think I am she was just starting. But it's the same fear that can come up once you're, you know, quote, unquote, successful, which you're successful the whole way through with, depending on how you're thinking about success. But once you've reached a certain level of success, like even more, so it can come up. Well, who do I think I am? Going for seven figures? Who do I think I am? You know, wanting to build a school in Africa? Who would they think I am? Who do I think I am? If I want a bigger house when you know, my house is there's a roof over my head and it's great and I should be grateful for that. You so these beliefs are very insidious, and they just keep unfortunately, they just keep coming up as we continue to grow and evolve on our many journeys.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:24:52

Yeah, that one that you just said really resonated for me that I already have enough right and that there's Somehow this association with that it's ungrateful of me to want more.

Karen Berzanski: 00:25:06

Yeah. And can you imagine a man having that saying that out loud? It seems to be an ugly female issue for some reason. Shocking. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's just the again, this is patriarchal money programming. Because women have been told through society through advertising through the movies, through television, you look at ads in the 1950s, and 60s, and you know, women were just using vacuums and like being pretty and you know, they weren't. So it's like all of that society is telling us where they think we should be. And how dare we try to open our own bank account without the signature of a male relative, right? And because that didn't happen until 1974, I think, how dare we tried to leave a marriage? How dare we try to have children and work at the same time, because it was legal to fire someone for being pregnant until I don't quite remember what year it was. But it was like a very, it was in the 20th century. So it's like, of course, we have these fears, because that's what society has been telling us for centuries, that we're not enough, you're not enough, has been reflected back to us in so many different ways. And if you think that that has not seeped into your subconscious mind, on some level, like you're mistaken, you know, people like me who do work around this, and like, I know that like, I am subject to those programs, too. You know, even though I can see them and I can identify them, I'm like, oh, gosh, like I really want to be mindful of not living into an idea of who I'm supposed to be based on society's version or somebody else's version of who they think I should be.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:27:04

Yeah, and even though like, there's a bit of a rebel in me, and like a fairly strong feminist, who's like, well screw all of that, I don't want to be any of those things. And I'm going to go up ahead. It doesn't mean it doesn't feel isolating, right, like that isolation, the fear of like, being out on your own limb doing that, and also, the fear of looking like the rebel, like looking like you're doing things out of spite, instead of out of like, your own personal desire, all of that becomes the layer that you're then going through,

Karen Berzanski: 00:27:39

Right. And this is where we need community, you know, like, I have learned the hard way that we're not meant, especially as women, like, we're just not, we're not meant to do this alone, there are so many things out there, that are so hard to move through and to process and like, you just go on Instagram, and you see, you know, all the trolls and the mean comments and all that stuff. Like, we need each other to remind each other, that it's safe to go out there and like, you fucking go out there and like, do your thing, and I am here for you. And if you need to come back and cry it out, like, we're gonna do that, if you're gonna have it, you know, if you go out there, and you do the thing, and you're, you know, if it works, or if it doesn't work, and then you come back and you have feelings either way, because, you know, you could go out there and, and kick ass and like, get the big results, and then be like, Oh, my God, I'm terrified. And like, all these feelings come up, because like, who am I now? And then you could go out there and like, do the thing and like, it doesn't go as planned. And again, like, it's like, Oh, I was there lots of feelings. So it's like, having the support system to know that, like, you can come back and be safe, no matter what happens out there, and we're gonna support you and pull you and push you forward. Like, there's, I just don't know how, how to do it any other way at this point?

Kelly Sinclair: 00:28:59

Ooh yeah, it's so true, having that support system is absolutely critical. So thank you for being one of the key people who's creating that space for women who are struggling with this, which is all of us now that you've listened to this episode, you're like, oh, that's me too. Even if you didn't, I was so sorry, not sorry that you now have this awareness because that is the first step to being able to move through it and actually be able to hit your financial goals and, you know, quote, unquote, fix your relationship with money, right? So that it can be that like, I love the way you phrased it like the Sexy Money energy, like thank you, I love that you're here. I love what I get to do with you and we have so much fun together. We're Disneyland that's immediately what I'm thinking I'm like we're all the vacations that it's for like and yes you might you know how you choose to use your money is based on your own values. And and I think that's where it really comes back. too, that is exactly why you need to, you know, straighten out this relationship so that you get to do more of the things that you value.

Karen Berzanski: 00:30:08

Absolutely. Yeah.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:30:10

So good. So Karen, let everybody know where they can find you and where they can like, learn more about this. And you mentioned your free gift and tell us all about that.

Karen Berzanski: 00:30:21

Yeah, so you can find me at theluckysoul.com. And @theluckysoul on Instagram, and Facebook, and I have a free I call it a whole body approach to money mindset training that you can get at theluckysoul.com/moneytraining. And so there's three bite size videos that will help you identify and release your hidden money programmings, like, identify what your specifically might be. And I'll give you some more examples of what that looks like. Then there is a guided tapping session on releasing financial stress and anxiety, no experience necessary. And as to bonus gifts, there is 20 What like I mentioned earlier, 21 abundance, activating strategies and 12 things to stop doing straightaway, if you want more money, and those are really easy, practical things that you can start doing today to get in right relationship with your money. And the other bonus is 26 powerful money mantras, which can help take you from lack to scarcity anytime you need a little push in that direction. And again, you can at theluckysoul.com/moneytraining.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:31:31

Amazing. I'm going to grab that and the link is going to be in the show notes below. So please make sure to reach out and connect with Karen and take her up on this amazing resource that she's sharing. Thank you for being here. Thank you for sharing all of this brilliance and wisdom with us today.

Karen Berzanski: 00:31:50

Thank you so much for having me, Kelly, this was a blast.

Kelly Sinclair: 00:31:55

You did it. You just listen to another episode of the Entrepreneur School podcast. It's like you just went to business school while you folded your laundry, prep dinner or picked up your kids at school. Thank you so much for being here. I want to personally celebrate your commitment to growing your business. You can imagine I'm throwing confetti for you right now. If you enjoyed today's episode, please leave us a review. Make sure you're subscribed and let us know you're listening by screenshotting this episode, and tagging us on Instagram, head to entrepreneurschool.ca for tons of tools and resources to help you grow your business while keeping your family a priority. You can subscribe to our email list and join our community. And until next time, go out there and do the thing.